Dream #1 – The Inept, Peeing Caregiver

In this dream, I found myself in the role of a caregiver, for a middle-aged woman in a hospital room. I discover pretty quickly that I’m not up to the job, but for some reason I keep trying, and end up completely sacrificing my own needs for that of this other person. I don’t so much as go to the restroom, eat or sleep all day. Finally I decide to take a break, and so I go to the toilet in the corner of the room to urinate–for a really long time–when suddenly the nurse walks in the room. I’m embarrassed, but I’m still peeing, so I smile and give her a well-what’re-ya-gonna-do look and turn away. She does too. The person I’m caretaking walks into the room next–she’s been asleep in the other room–and I continue to pee. The toilet has disappeared by now, and I’m just peeing all over the floor. I’m barefoot, standing in a puddle about four inches deep. Completely disgusted and humiliated, I grab toilet paper and try to dab it up. Obviously it’s impossible, so I grab two paper towels, crumple them up and start dabbing. This is no good either. I think, “Maybe I should get a real towel.”

Gosh. I wonder what this dream was about.

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Dream #2 – Almost the Feel-Good Movie of the Year

Audrey Tautou and a guy are a good-looking young couple. They’re driving home from a date, smiling and laughing, and the car flips over. It continues to speed along, upside down, and both of them are trapped underneath it. We see their hands get trapped and mangled. When we see them next, the two of them are in a hospital room, and their heads are bald, bulbous and completely swollen, like that of the Elephant Man, or Mon Mothma (from Star Wars, dontcha know). They both consider suicide, but decide that they want to live, and even to keep dating, despite their deformities. There’s a shot of them making love–a blue blanket pulled completely over them–with his head bobbing up and down underneath the blanket. I predict that this movie would give The Feel-Good Movie of the Year a serious run for its money. It’s got everything; love, tragedy, human drama, but most of all, it’s a story about the triumph of the human spirit.

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P.S. I can’t decide if I want the name of my autobiography to be “The Inept, Peeing Caregiver” or “Bald, Bulbous and Completely Swollen.”

Maybe you can help me decide? Thanks!